My Articles: Love and Relationship: Be a Successful
|Be a Successful Spouse
If we have good parents, then we tend to recall our childhood as happy.
Consequently, if the children are good, then the parents did their job well.
The deciding factor is love. The quality of our life is greatly determined by
our parents' love. If we don't receive proper love as children, then our hearts
are not fully developed. Generally speaking, those who can give and receive
love had a good childhood.
The value of the Blessing
After the Blessing, if you feel your spouse is cold toward you and can't
receive love, then perhaps their childhood was not good. In other words,
ironically, one could say that my happiness is determined by my spouse's
childhood. Our quality of life is determined not by money or knowledge, but the
love we received during infancy.
All religions have made a great mistake. They teach that we have to perfect
ourselves. The True Parents are the only ones to have declared that it is my
spouse who perfects me.
Five attributes of a husband's love are interest, responsibility,
understanding, respect, and giving first. It is very important that we check
ourselves regularly in these areas in relationship to your wife.
1. Pay attention
The fact that you wake up in the morning is a miracle. Everyday should be
looked upon as a gift from God. Look at each other's eyes. We should help each
other. If your husband is ill, then the wife must bear some responsibility. If
you don't love your husband/wife to this degree, you cannot possibly prepare
the conditions for your eternal life.
Our spouse is so precious. Check his/her eyes for health. If there is no love,
always check the eyes. If the husband/wife doesn't want to look at you, then
something may be wrong. It is our original mind trying to tell us something.
Paying attention to our spouse's every gesture, act, and word is a habit of
love that we all need to develop. It doesn't cost us a penny but can generate
an invaluable return investment.
2. Love means to take responsibility
We should take responsibility for our mission/jobs. The perfection of our
character comes through a life of faith. The goal of a life of faith is to
perfect our character and to take responsibility for our family and job. The
worst character trait for a person is to be irresponsible. Husbands must learn
how to proportion each day so both family and mission receive your full
ability, talents, and love.
3. Love comes from understanding
Even a small misunderstanding has the potential to separate the husband and
wife. How can we increase understanding? Dialogue and communication. Don't
chastise or judge your spouse. Instead, take time and report to each other. At
the end of the day tell each other everything. Your spouse is your best friend.
Understanding entails forgiveness. This is why the messiah comes. Without
forgiveness, you are not husband and wife, but just "companions." Your spouse
is not just a roommate. She is your personal channel to eternal life. If there
is no forgiveness, then we may miss the possibility to enter the Kingdom of